The van Putten Diaries

Our neighbor said something a couple of days ago that has stuck with me.  We were continuing the generic "get to know you" stuff, us as internationals and she a Dutch person.  Towards the end, she said "It's not that the lifestyle there [in the US] is bad , it just wasn't the right fit for you ." I think this idea is something I've felt, but I hadn't been able to frame for myself in this context.  The way in which we live - our lifestyle - includes, and is determined by, so many factors that it's difficult to pin down.  But since moving here, something has just clicked.  I feel like I've settled into a memory foam pillow.  The feeling of something always being just slightly wrong has lifted off my shoulders.  I feel so much freer here.   I'm clearly still struggling to put what I'm feeling into words, but I think the lifestyle changes have had a huge positive impact on my everyday life and wellbeing.  When we decided to move, these th...

REMINDER OF OUR PREVIOUS INTRO: It has been on Nic's radar for months that I was coming after him for this blog.  He finally felt ready and we forced a few hours to ourselves over the weekend to talk - yes, I said hours.  My transcription of our conversation is almost word for word, so it's quite lengthy and I'm going to break it down into his specific points. This section is made up of follow-up questions to our original conversation. PART 4 Alex:   So, a few other questions. You came downstairs after putting the kids to bed on whatever day it was, January 3rd maybe, of 2021 and you just looked at me and you said “How do you feel about leaving the country?”  What made that your moment?   Nic:  My professor, my advisor.  It’s when I was chatting on Facebook with him.  Going back a number of years, I've been engaging in frequent conversations with my advisor from college, U.S. government professor now retired.  We would exchange thoughts o...

REMINDER OF OUR PREVIOUS INTRO: It has been on Nic's radar for months that I was coming after him for this blog.  He finally felt ready and we forced a few hours to ourselves over the weekend to talk - yes, I said hours.  My transcription of our conversation is almost word for word, so it's quite lengthy and I'm going to break it down into his specific points. Alex:   So why did we leave the United States? Nic:  Right… so, you have asked me to give kind of my take on the the political and systemic issues in the United States that made me not optimistic. I haven’t quite prepared this out, but I think it broke down into a few different issues.  First, you’ve got  the breakdown of norms that underpin our system , and that is something I started noticing as far back as 2011 and really crystallized in maybe 2014 to 2016. Second, we have the  systemic level imbalances in our political system that are on a trajectory to only worsen  towards greater minor...

REMINDER OF OUR PREVIOUS INTRO: It has been on Nic's radar for months that I was coming after him for this blog.  He finally felt ready and we forced a few hours to ourselves over the weekend to talk - yes, I said hours.  My transcription of our conversation is almost word for word, so it's quite lengthy and I'm going to break it down into his specific points. Alex:   So why did we leave the United States? Nic:  Right… so, you have asked me to give kind of my take on the the political and systemic issues in the United States that made me not optimistic. I haven’t quite prepared this out, but I think it broke down into a few different issues.  First, you’ve got  the breakdown of norms that underpin our system , and that is something I started noticing as far back as 2011 and really crystallized in maybe 2014 to 2016. Second, we have the  systemic level imbalances in our political system that are on a trajectory to only worsen  towards greater minor...

It has been on Nic's radar for months that I was coming after him for this blog.  He finally felt ready and we forced a few hours to ourselves over the weekend to talk - yes, I said hours.  My transcription of our conversation is almost word for word, so it's quite lengthy and I'm going to break it down into his specific points. PART 1 Alex:   So why did we leave the United States?   Nic:   Right… so, you have asked me to give kind of my take on the the political and systemic issues in the United States that made me not optimistic. I haven’t quite prepared this out, but I think it broke down into a few different issues.  First, you’ve got the breakdown of norms that underpin our system , and that is something I started noticing as far back as 2011 and really crystallized in maybe 2014 to 2016. Second, we have the systemic level imbalances in our political system that are on a trajectory to only worsen towards greater minority rule.  Third – and, to a ...

I interviewed Miles (age 7) for the second time on March 29th.  This is directly what he said, though some of the answers required my deeper probing before they were answered.  My comments and clarifications will be in non-italics font while Miles' answers will be in italics .  The last time we talked, you were talking about how excited you were to move into our new house because there would be more space and you would be able to get more things.  Does it feel better here than being at the apartment? Yeah. What are your favorite things, either - (interrupted) The dogs. The dogs are your favorite things? One of my favorites.  Also that park right there. Yeah, that park is pretty awesome.  What are some of the best things about being in Leiden?  Or about being in a different country and a different culture? I can tell you one of the NOT so good things in Amsterdam. In Amsterdam?  What do you know about Amsterdam?  (he's never been) We...

I interviewed David (age 4, almost 5) for the first time on March 29th.  This is directly what David said, though some of the answers required my deeper probing before they were answered.  My comments and clarifications will be in non-italics font while David's answers will be in italics.   What are the best things about living in Leiden? I want to tell you about the adventure things, in Tacoma and here.  First, Point Defiance. Do you miss Point Defiance? Not really, not hiking it, just the beach.  I don't like hiking, that's why I don't miss it. Oh, I'm sorry.  What else, what about the adventure thing? The beach. The beach here or in Tacoma are you talking about? Here. You like it here? Yeah. Is that one of the best things about living here?  The beach? Yeah. (We haven't visited the beach since moving here, but we did in 2021) What are some of the other best things about being here? The house... well, mostly that Charmander  (David's s...