The Absolute WORST Things

Nowhere is perfect, it's true.  The Netherlands has its flaws just like anywhere else, even though I've spent the last 2 years observing and commenting on almost exclusively positive things.  I thought maybe it was time to gather up some of the negatives.

The issue I'm having, however, is that I look at this list and it's contents feel just so inconsequential compared to what we left behind and how much the US has continued to devolve since.  When Nic and I talk amongst ourselves about the negative things we've experienced and observed here, it almost feels like an inside joke.  In the grand scheme of our life experiences, does this thing (insert something from the below list here) actually suck?  No, not often.

So, with as genuine of feeling as I can muster and all joking aside, these are the absolute worst things we've encountered so far in The Netherlands (mostly in order of relevance).

1. Smoking

I know that I came from a region with a low smoking rate so my global standard is skewed, but wow - smoking is so pervasive here.  Smokers seem to come from all backgrounds and all age groups.  I swear I've seen people as young as 14 with cigarettes.  There's no real effort to contain the spent butts either, so they're scattered all over the place and I've rarely seen a deposit for them to go in.  I can't imagine how many could be dredged from the canals if we looked.

I've been assured that the government has tried to crack down on smoking, but it hasn't really worked.  Cigarettes are not allowed in public indoor spaces, as of recently can only be bought from specific stores, and every package dispays a different "observe the consequences" kind of picture (think black lungs) on it with no branding.  Yet, the government could do so much more. There is no culture of shame here which I felt loud and clear in the US.  It's also legal to stand directly next to an open door or on your balcony and blow smoke into everyone's faces.  People even smoke while riding their bikes, so I get stuck behind it quite often.  

It's a real effort anytime we go anywhere to avoid the smoke, which not only concerns me for my health, my family's health, and the general quality of our environment, but we're also now having conversations about how to make sure our kids don't become smokers - something we didn't feel the need to be concerned about in the US.

2. Mopeds in the bike lanes

Considering how amazing these bike lanes are, the fact that mopeds are allowed in them should feel pretty minor.  And it is, but it's also sometimes scary AF.  The bike lanes can be narrow and often peopleare riding side by side, including parents helping their small kids navigate the lanes on their own bikes.  This minimizes how much space is available for anyone else to pass, and mopeds operate at such a speed that they always need to pass.  They often slow down enough to do so, because honestly the drivers here are so much better no matter what they're driving, but not always do they slow down enough to feel genuinely safe.  They are loud, cutting any opportunity to continue the conversation you're having with your biking partner - not to mention that the noise is instantly overwhelming for anyone already sensitive to noises (me).  Overall, I'd say this is one of the "worst things" that doesn't even come close to problems with cars in the US, but poses enough of a lifestyle and safety concern that it makes the list.  

3. Different lens on inclusion

I've written about this before, but Dutch culture has a different take on the ideas of equity and inclusion.  The Netherlands is first and foremost a place where your right to be yourself, no matter who that self is, is valued above most other things.  The Dutch people are very proud of their roots in tolerance and their systems and policies reflect that value pretty well.  In fact, the conservative political factions here are pro-LGBTQIA issues and use this stance to simultaneously be anti-Muslim because Islam tends to be less tolerant of queer people.

However, just because you've made it mostly safe for people to live freely as themselves (insert a whole list of caveats here) doesn't mean that you have given them a seat at the table.  The everyday practice of "tolerance" here matches the modern use of the word in American English - it's fine that it's there, but deep down I'd prefer not to have it.  

It feels very NIMBY and colorblind, which go hand in hand with certain levels of privilege that I feel contribute to this lack of inclusion.  The Netherlands is very safe, clean, and prosperous.  Hardship does indeed exist and I don't mean to belittle those experiences, but my experience with Duch people, as a generalization, is that they have had it very good in life which makes it difficult to see how it could be different for others.  Without that degree of empathy, it's hard to understand why systems need to exist to elevate the voices of the underrepresented.  I often talk about queer issues at work and I sometimes hear responses from colleagues that they never realized why it was so important for queer people in other countries to be so loud because queer people don't have to fight for a voice here.  On the one hand this is true when considering the queer population as a more widely protected category of historically marginalized peoples.  However, the perception of being from any marginalized community as such a non-issue often perpetuates that very marginalization. 

4. Notaries

This is a higher up on Nic's problem list because he's dealt with this level of bureaucracy more often than I have, but suffice it to say that having documents notarized here is a whole thing.  It's a legal act conducted by highly specialized and very expensive attorneys who require an insane level of detail and procedures to follow.  The complete opposite end of the spectrum from the very lax notarization process in the US.

5. Nothing is wild

A very PNW complaint, maybe a more generally American complaint, but there is no wilderness here.  I mean, "Netherlands" literally means "lowlands" because it's a massive river delta / swamp where much of the land wouldn't even be here if it weren't for human intervention.  Every tree feels like it was planted exactly where it should grow, the canals and lakes are entirely humanmade, and even when you travel to places that are supposed to have wildlife (near the German border), there are comparatively very few critters.  Our life now consists of a whole lot of new bird species and the elimination of most other forms of visable ecodiversity.  

(Sidenote, I never thought this could be the case for me but I've come to really like birds and tried to get to know a bit more about them.  Maybe I'm just picking up hobbies appropriate to my age!)

6. Mosquitos

Okay, well if you want to, you can count mosquitos as wildlife and then I'd say there's a lot more wildlife around then I actually wanted.  Mosquito season is kind of excruciating, particularly for the kids, and if 2024 could be considered "average" then the season runs from around May through November.

7. Not the weather

You know, I imagine people from around the world complain about the weather no matter what the weather actually is, and the Dutch are no different.  I'm also often asked about the weather from other folks considering moving abroad.  Me?  I love the weather here.  It's very similar to the PNW, but less extreme - minimal snow, more frequent sunshine in the winter, less rain, and definitely less hot in the summer.  The one exception to the more mild weather patterns is the WIND and I find it glorious.  There is a reason why The Netherlands is famous for its windmills.  Maybe the weather here isn't for you, but it's lovely for me.

[Photo of adorable graffiti in Groningen]